Leaving Texas to Fort Sill, Oklahoma
Can we go too?
This is not my usual "What card have I made today" post. My son took some vacation time from his job as a soldier in the United States Army to come to Texas to see family and friends. Tomorrow, he will undergo extensive oral dental surgery at Fort Sill and will remain on sick leave for 4 or 5 days to recuperate. It makes me feel terrible that I can't be there to hold his hand and reassure him. At 25 years of age, he is a little too old for that but I could tell that he is a little apprehensive about the surgery. I am sure the Army will take good care of him....but at the same time, I feel guilty that he has to go through this experience alone.
So, my question of the day is this:
As mothers, at what age do we "let go" and stop worrying about our children? Stop giving advice? Learn to listen and keep our mouth shut? As a mother of only one child....how do I stop wanting to protect him from everything? Do mothers with more than one child feel the sadness and anguish that I am feeling now? My answer: probably......it is our job! lol Our job, as mothers, is to raise them up in the way they should go....and they will not depart from it. I have done my job. I could not be prouder of my son who is kind, compassionate, giving, affectionate, financially disciplined, an over-achiever (like me), loyal and ambitious. He also can walk into a room and in five minutes or less, the room explodes in messiness. You can always tell where he is or what he is doing.....just follow the trail. lol
I just love it when he comes to see me. We have such a bond with each other and everything is so easy.
I absolutely hate it when he leaves because I do not like the extreme sadness I feel as I watch him drive away, and, with a smile on my face so he can't see the sadness..........wondering when I will see him again.
My last words today were "Don't forget to call me when you get there." His response, "You know I will forget but I know in exactly five hours from now you will be calling me repeatedly until I answer the phone."
My son knows me so well.
GREAT post. LOVED the pictures. I can't believe he let those dogs in his brand new truck. LOL For me, I listen to the kids and it's hard to let them learn from experience, but that's what they want. They want to try it their way. And I was the exact same way, so I understand that sense of "pass or fail" at least I tried. I love that my kids have reached that age where they do call us for advise... so different from when they were teenagers and knew more than we did. LOL It's all just a cycle. Our son races motorcycles and has sponsors, and yet when he came to visit and was going to take the motorcycle for a ride, here I was saying, wear your helmet, do take risks on the road because it's not worth it... and so on and son on. He's like, Mom, I know. haha But he is patient with my mothering. Each of our children have a special name they call me. For Jimmy, he calls me "mothership". Keri calls me "mom". Kati calls me "mommy" but usually when she wants something. haha And Bonnie calls me "MomMom". I love that they each have that special name for me. And they all call Tom Daddy-O. Love you! I'm busy making 10 cookout invitations. Will post and catch up with PM's when I'm done. Smiles & Hugs! :) Janis
ReplyDeleteOmg, talking about letting go, my daughter will be getting married. I thought leaving for college was the ultimate empty nest syndrome, found out it was emptiness. It gets better after time, they come home to visit and back to school, yeah for summer breaks you have them for 2 months and some. Now she is 21 and getting married, how do I feel that emptiness is my question? I know she won't be to faraway but never the less as a mother you still worry. I don't think it ever ends, the good thing is that they know you love them and they will love you too!
ReplyDeleteWonderful post! Great pics also :o) I think I can only imagine how you feel when he leaves you. My oldest only going on 17, I don't like to think about him being away from me. He has already expressed to us about not staying here long after graduating and I don't like to think about it. Then having to go through 3 others is going to be just as difficult. I hear you on the "call me when you get there", when mine don't I too call until they answer :o) They know me well enough to say the same think Matt did :o) As a fellow Mom, I don't think we can ever fully let go, at least I know I won't! I would rather my children grow in to adults knowing I love them with everything I am and take the over protectiveness with them, while rolling their eyes :o) Once you make the choice to become a Mom, you are always a Mom regardless of their age :o)
ReplyDeleteSheree, what a great post. Love the pictures. I have one son as you know and at 23 is now married with his own house and expecting their first baby soon. Just after the baby shower last weekend it hit me that he really does have his own life and family now. But that won't stop me from thinking about them every day and wondering how things are. And probably worrying too. I think once a mother always a mother. I know with all the stressful things Todd & I are going through right now my 77 year old mother is worried about me. We let them choose their path in life but I don't think we ever totally let them go...they are part of us. Hugs, girlfriend!!!
ReplyDelete